How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others And Find Your Strengths

Don’t look back or you won’t see what’s coming.

Glory Barbaris

There’s this pressure that comes with the new year and new decade. It’s so easy to fall victim to the pressures of seeing other people thriving and then feeling like you’re supposed to be there, doing how good they’re doing. You know, the comparison game, essentially making yourself feel like your life is worthless or not good enough because other people in the same business are doing much better than you.

I almost allowed myself to fall victim to this ridiculous notion of comparison, especially working in two of the most competitive fields in the creative space–as a wedding planner and social media influencer. There is something to be said about self-esteem that thankfully did not allow me to go down this narrow and dark path of comparison.

Don’t allow yourself to be so small-minded. Instead think of ways in which you can cultivate your own path to success, starting with right where you are. Tap into your strengths, work on your weaknesses, make a priority list, set goals, stay focused and always remember your big picture.

Glory Barbaris

I always get the question: how did you start your wedding planning business? Truth is the business sort of found me, and in the beginning I definitely was one of those people who thought I had to be at the level of others that were already working in the biz way before me. I didn’t have confidence at all, not as a wedding planner. I had so much confidence as an 18-year woman in Tech, senior analyst, executive marketer, and senior product manager. I knew my shit when it came to these areas and I have two very distinctive degrees to back up my unique experiences. I can walk into any conference room or project and stand up an agile team; design enterprise systems with all the bells and whistles; translate business requirements into technical requirements, and bridge the tech gaps between the business execs and developers and engineers. I can build a website in half a day; words came easily to me so I can pull together technical training manuals and develop technical and user training courses with ease. I could even plan major tech conferences and expos in DC, Vegas or Miami (all of which I did for 18 years), but as a wedding planner just starting out 3-4 years ago, I was a little intimidated. It’s normal and I believe it’s that little feeling of feeling scared that truly drives us to succeed in life.

ALWAYS CREATING, INC. HQ – LOUDOUN COUNTY, VIRGINIA

“You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.”

Eleanor Roosevelt

Then one day 1.5 years ago, I decided that I wasn’t going to look at what others were doing. Instead I shifted my focus to my strengths, dug deep and reconnected with my passion (my WHY), and ultimately found my confidence in event and wedding planning. And I knew that I wanted to do it all through kindness. From that moment forward, my company, @alwayscreatingstudio has flourished beyond my wildest dreams. No, I’m not where I envision myself and my company to be (because I’m constantly dreaming bigger and larger, I have to; otherwise what’s the point). The difference between that Glory and THIS Glory is that I am rooted in my confidence and my ability to bring kindness into everything I do and say. Kindness not just to others, but to myself.

Now the only time I look back is to see just how far I’ve come, in life and work.

Glory Barbaris, Founder + Creative Director

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